Well the hour is drawing near for me to head uptown to see my doctor. As I said yesterday, I was given the news from a second doc that I was recommended to see. He was faxed the results, planned a series of tests for me before lining me up for surgery. I'm sure that today will be much of the same. It has been a difficult day so far. Internal turmoil, enough tears shed to flood Manhattan, and strife with my wife over her dental appointment and my lack of patience.
Right now it is very hard for me to be there for others when I'm scared shitless internally. She is right, I should step out of myself for a few hours to be there for her. She's terrified of the dentist and I was just irritable. I'm taking this antibiotic that keeps me up all night and fuels this anger that's inside of me. It's not too fun being me right now.
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